family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten...

The other day, I discovered that Ecuadorians have a very different sense of family than we do. I sort of had an idea of this previously, but now, living with a close family, I really see it. Yesterday, my host mom, Marcia, asked me if I had spoken with my parents lately. I said I had. She said, if any of my daughters ever left me for a year, I don´t know what I would do. I then tried to explain that I think that idea of family is a bit different in the US. Just because I´m away from my parents doesn´t mean that I love them any less. (right, mom and dad?) She said, "yes I think that´s true. My brother lives in Italy, and when he left, it was so sad for our family." and she started crying! Right then and there! The thought, first of her daughters growing up and leaving the house, and second of her brother living in Italy was enough to bring her to tears. The idea of not being surrounded by her family, is heartbreaking to her. For clarification, the rest of her 5 siblings and their children all live within walking distance and they come over for lunch every day. Her daughters will definitely not be leaving the house until the day they get married. Could you imagine living like that in the US? Parents, I do love you very much, but I´d go nuts. and YOU´d go nuts! It´s just a different idea of what family means. Personally, I´m ok with our American culture. I´m fine with leaving the house at age 18 and being independent. (Funny, that was one of our vocabulary words, and it was the hardest to explain to my class, because none of my students are independent by American standards) But I´m very glad that I´m being exposed to different ways of living. This is why I feel so lucky to be accepted into this new family, because I know what family means to them. So being accepted as one of them comes with serious benefits in a country where I am considered alone because I´m here without any family. It also means that my host mom piles food on my plate and complains when I don´t finish it all. "You´re eating less and less!" and I think to myself, it´s because you people eat heapings of rice for lunch and dinner! but I´ll take it if that´s what it means to part of this family.